I’m trying to keep the “Real Meaning of Christmas” a priority in our household. So, every morning before school, I’ve been reading a bit of Luke II or whatever as part of our daily dose of Scripture Power. I expected this to keep the holiday Christ-centered, not as commercial, etc.
What I did not expect was the following conversation . . .
ME: ” . . . and the angel did speak unto the virgin Mary . . .”
JEFF: Mom, what’s a virgin?
ME: Erm.
ELEANOR: Yeah, Mom. What is it? They are always calling Mary that.
ME: [looks at watch; 10 minutes until school bell rings] It’s a . . . woman who is young and innocent?
JEFF: So that means you’re still a virgin, Mom?
ME: [nervous laughter] No, no, I’m not a virgin anymore. It’s . . . a woman who has never been married?
JEFF: [thinks]
JEFF: [thinks]
JEFF: So is that why people get divorced? Because they want to be a virgin again?
ME: No, that wouldn’t make you a virgin again. A virgin is a woman who has . . . never BEEN with a man [rolls eyes at herself] Or, a woman who has never had relations with a man [rolls eyes at bad Monica Lewinsky flashback] or, erm . . . erm . . . errrrururuuruuuummmmm . . .
And so on. I think I kept stumbling over myself for a few more seconds, and then declared that “this doesn’t have anything do to with Christmas, anyway,” smacked the Bible shut, and sent them off to school.
I friend suggested that I say a virgin is someone who is “pure,” but that’s not true. I’m not a virgin, and I consider myself to still be pure, honest, faithful person. All it really means is a person who has had sex, and the emphasis in the Nativity is about the miraculous aspect of Immaculate Conception, but that wasn’t something I wanted to get into right before school (geeez, who knows WHAT note Jeff’s teacher might send home) or in front of my four-year-old. Ack, ack, ack.
Thanks a LOT, St. Luke.
Casa Camisas 
Ha! I love it!
Now I’m sitting around thinking about how you define Virgin for kids (because now that you mention it, I realize I should be prepared…it’s only a matter of days before I get asked.)
Virgin: someone who has never ever even TRIED to have a baby? Someone who could be a mommy but can’t have a baby because there never has been a daddy?
Wow. That’s a tricky one. Especially right before school!
I think you should stick with the “virgin = pure” definition, because it has the most potential to give you gray hairs.
[arriving home from school] “Mom, I’m not sure I’m a virgin anymore.”
[in Sharing Time at church] “I want to be baptized so I can be a virgin again.”
I LOVE this story. Laugh out loud funny. Especially because I’ve seen my kids squint in confusion as I read that phrase, but luckily they are still young enough to let it slide and not ask. I know that question is coming soon for me too.
However, living in a community that is about 90% catholic, has taught me something that you got wrong. Just FYI: the immaculate conception has nothing to do with the conception of Jesus. That phrase is about Mary – her conception. Check out wikipedia’s explanation:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immaculate_Conception
Obviously, I need to hang around more Catholics. Wow, thanks!
Ha! I think you mean “who has {not} had sex”. I was worried about that same question from June recently, but it never got brought up. I’ll just send over to your house when she eventually asks. 🙂